


Bleeding Love: Stupid Cliches

by writenow753



Series: Bleeding Love Saga [2]
Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Breaking Up & Making Up, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, First Love, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Heartbreak, Jinyoung-Centric, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Romance, Roommates, Third Wheels, bleeding love saga, jinyoung and jaebum are best friends, protective!jaebum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-20
Updated: 2016-09-20
Packaged: 2018-08-16 09:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8096083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writenow753/pseuds/writenow753
Summary: This follows Bleeding Love: Stupid Questions (blsq, for short).  Although this isn't exactly a sequel in the general sense, it will be beneficial if you read blsq first because I like symmetry and things like that.  College AU.  JJProject and Markjin.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The first two chapters will still very much be in the same timeline as Bleeding Love: Stupid Questions.

There’s a saying for everything. Everything happens for a reason is one. Cliches, idioms, proverbs…. whatever you want to call them, they’re all stupid and annoying and useless.

Don’t cry over spilled milk. Yeah, say that to someone who spilled milk (or any liquid) on their cell phone or their other electronic devices. These days all the top tech and most wanted gadgets are crazy expensive.

Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened. Yeah, say that to someone after they got a shot in their backside. Shots are the devil and hurt like hell.

—

“Hey, give that back to me! I was eating it,” Jinyoung says, laughing as he tries to take back the half eaten chocolate chip cookie that Jaebum steals from him. “Hyung, that’s mean!”

Jaebum holds it out of his reach and then does that completely annoying routine of pretending to offer it before popping the cookie in his mouth the very next second. “Yum, delicious,” he says, his mouth full and crumbs falling out when he tries to smile. “Sorry? It’s your fault though, I really like the cookies you bake.”

“I’ll show you what it means to be sorry,” Jinyoung warns before launching himself at Jaebum, causing him to fall backward on the sofa with a loud uumpph. Jinyoung then proceeds to start tickling the life (nearly) out of him.

They’re both out of breath with laughter and close to tears when Mark comes in. Earlier Jinyoung had unlocked the door when Mark texted about coming over after his last class ended.

“Uh, guys? Should I come back another time?”

Jinyoung looks up and grins, untangling himself from Jaebum to go greet his boyfriend. “Hey! No, help me punish Jaebum. He ate my cookie! And it’s the last bit of chocolate in the apartment.” He turns to Jaebum and glares at him. “Vengeance shall be mine!”

Jaebum laughs and throws a pillow at him. “Yeah, right. I’d like to see that,” he teases.

—

“Hey, can I borrow your phone? Mine died and I need to call my study partner to make sure I didn’t mix up the dates and check that it’s tomorrow we’re supposed to meet up.”

“Yeah, that’s fine. You know I don’t care.” Jinyoung grabs his phone off the side table and gives it to his boyfriend. “I’m going to get something to drink. Want anything?”

“A soda is fine, thanks.”

Jinyoung’s in the kitchen when Mark yells at him. “Hey, what’s your unlock password number?”

“1694.”

Mark’s glad the girl wrote down her cell number on his test guide, otherwise he would be completely out of luck right now. His finger swiftly unlocks Jinyoung’s phone, and he goes to dial his partner’s number when he notices that Jinyoung has Jaebum saved as number one on his speed dial.

 _It doesn’t mean anything_ , he tells himself. _We haven’t been dating that long._

Jinyoung comes back with drinks and a bag of chips as Mark finishes his call, and Mark smiles his thanks and passes Jinyoung’s phone back to him.

“Hey, what’s special about 1694?” he asks a little while later. Jinyoung’s stretched out on the couch, his feet resting in Mark’s lap. The TV is on some sports channel because it’s something Mark likes.

“It’s Jaebum hyung’s birthday. I’m terrible at remembering numbers, and I figured my birthday would be too obvious, right?” Jinyoung sits up and grabs the bag of chips again because it’s true, they’re addicting.

“Yeah, right.”

“Hey, do you want to watch a movie later? Jaebum should be out of class in another couple hours, and we can order pizza or whatever else you’re in the mood for.”


	2. Chapter 2

The story of how Jinyoung meets Mark is riddled with cliches.

The first time they meet, it’s early morning hours and Jinyoung’s in line at The Bean Barn because caffeine flowing through his veins is the only way he’s going to make it through the long day ahead of him.

He reaches for his wallet to take out his Barn’s punch card (he’s two punches away from receiving a free coffee) and to pay for his drink when he comes up empty handed.

_Well, crap._

“Um, I uh—” he starts, feeling a little embarrassed at the predicament he finds himself in. “I must have left my wallet at home, I’m so sorry but—”

“I’ll pay for it,” a voice behind him offers just as the cashier says, “We don’t take IOU’s.” Clearly the cashier’s not a morning person.

“I didn’t expect you to,” he tells the girl and he’s about to turn to politely say _no thank you_ , when a hand with a bank card is presented to the cashier and she gladly takes it and adds the mystery guy’s drink order to his tab.

He turns to face his good Samaritan and is struck by how good-looking he is and he realizes he’s staring — and that’s rude — so he quickly covers his faux pas and tells him, “Thank you.”

“Do you come here often?” He cringes, realizing how that sounds. “I uh— I meant so that I can repay the favor and buy you coffee.”

The guy smiles, and Jinyoung’s more than a little charmed. “Don’t worry about it. Just thought I’d help a fellow caffeine addict out.”

Jinyoung is about to say something else when he hears his drink order being called out loud. He looks at his watch, he’s running behind already and now he needs to backtrack to his apartment to get his wallet so that he’ll have his student identification card.

“I’m going to be late for class, but maybe we’ll meet again?”

It’s two weeks later and Jinyoung has his hands full with books and papers and he’s so focused on not dropping anything he forgets the most important and basic rule: to look in front of you when you walk. Which is why he ends up crashing into another person.

“I’m so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention,” he apologizes quickly and bends down to gather his belongings before the autumn wind carries them farther away.

“Here, let me help you.”

That voice. Jinyoung looks up and recognizes the guy that he bumped into. “You, from the coffee shop.”

“Yes and you should be more careful.” The guy’s voice holds no hint of anger or annoyance though, and he even goes to pick up a few things that had fallen farther away. “I think this is it?”

“Yeah, thank you. Hey um—” His phone starts ringing and he frowns, wishing he could ignore it. “Sorry, I’m actually running late to a group project meeting and—”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve got some things to do too. It was nice bumping into you again,” he replies with a quick grin. “Good luck with your project.”

Three weeks later, Jinyoung walks into a florist shop and is surprised — but maybe by now he shouldn’t be? — to see his good Samaritan working behind the counter. He’s got his head down, concentrating on filling out some kind of paperwork, but Jinyoung easily recognizes him right away.

“So we meet again.”

“Hi, how can I assist—” he stops as he looks up and sees Jinyoung. “Should I be worried about stalking?” he jokes.

Jinyoung laughs and raises his right hand, like he’s a Boy Scout reciting a pledge. “I promise I have no ill intentions toward you.”

“Well, that’s a relief. It’s funny you came in today though.”

“Oh, why is that?”

“Because it’s my last day working here. I’ve got a new job starting next week.” He puts away the paperwork he’d been working on before he speaks again. “But my shift’s not over yet, so how can I help you?”

“I want to buy some flowers.”

The other man laughs. “You’ve come to the right place then. If you tell me a little about the person you’re buying for, I can give you some suggestions.”

“Thanks, that’d be helpful.” He stops to consider for a few moments, looking around the shop at all the colorful, cheery flowers available to buy. “She’s smart, beautiful, incredibly kind…” Jinyoung notices while he speaks, the other guy’s smile drops briefly before changing into one of full professionalism. Gone is the bright, genuine one he was greeted with earlier. _Interesting_ , he thinks. “She’s the most important person in my life,” he continues, “and she’s the only woman I’ve ever said I love you to.”

“Your girlfriend is very lucky. If you’ll follow me, I can point out a few ideas for you.” His good Samaritan is in full sales clerk mode.

“The flowers are for my mother,” Jinyoung interrupts with a smile, curious to see the other’s response to the information. “She’s coming to visit tomorrow.”

“Your mother? Oh, sorry. Uh wait, not sorry… I mean, it’s nice that your mother is coming to see you. And that you’re buying her flowers.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Finally he’s the one saying those words, and not the other way around. “It’s cute.”

“Did you just call me cute?”

Jinyoung coughs to try to mask his laugh and shrugs a little. He’s taken around the shop; ideas are suggested and flower meanings are explained. In the end he chooses yellow tulips (conveying cheerful thoughts) and pink roses (symbolizing grace and elegance as well as love and appreciation).

“Thank you for all the help,” Jinyoung tells him, when they arrive back at the register. It’s the third time they’ve met and he still doesn’t know the other guy’s name — he’s not wearing a nametag on his shirt either. In his head, he keeps thinking of him as the coffee shop guy, the good Samaritan, and that sexy guy I keep bumping into. “I’m Jinyoung by the way.”

Mr. Sexy Coffee Shop Good Samaritan Guy looks up from cutting and placing the flowers in a vase. “Mark,” he says, grinning widely. “It’s nice to finally meet you Jinyoung.”

It only takes a few minutes more for Mark to ring up the flowers and for Jinyoung to pay, and they say their goodbyes. He’s about to walk out the door, but at the last second, he stops to turn back around, shifting the vase to his side so the bouquet of flowers don’t block his face from view. “What time does your shift end?” 

Mark takes a quick look at his watch. “In about thirty minutes. Why?”

“Would you like to go get a cup of coffee? I still owe you one.”

It’s ten minutes after they’re seated at a table with coffee in hand that a random thought pops into Jinyoung’s mind, considering how very romcom-like their meetings have been. “You’re not secretly slumming it and hiding the fact that you’re really a prince, are you?”

—

After their first coffee outing, he sees Mark often. Jinyoung invites Mark to hang out with Jaebum and him. Sometimes he’ll invite their neighbors over as well, and they do a game night or watch a football game on TV. A couple of times they hang out with Mark’s best friend, but it’s rare because he’s some kind of genius sports guy and he’s busy training most of the time.

It takes two months of hanging out as just friends before Mark officially asks him out on a date.

And it’s on their hundred day anniversary that Mark shares the first time he saw Jinyoung hadn’t been their meeting at The Bean Barn. They both were attending a college party, one of those where the host invites a couple dozen people that then turns into a couple hundred type of party. It’d been nearing three in the morning, and Mark had been over the party festivities for the last half hour. Both his “friends” — he uses the term loosely — he came with ended up ditching him the hour before for a couple smoking hot girls who seemed likely to put out (his friends’ words, not his).

It was the precise moment that he’d been heading to find the party host to say _thank you_ and _good night_ that he saw Jinyoung across the room. He didn’t know his name or the name of the guy he’d been laughing with — it had been Jaebum — but despite the distance there was just something about Jinyoung that he’d been struck by and at that moment, all he could focus on was wanting to meet him. Fate hadn’t been on his side that night because by the time he made his way through the crowd, party host completely forgotten, Jinyoung had been gone.

But a month later Mark walked into a coffee shop — one that he never been to before and decided to try on a whim — and found himself standing behind the guy at the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We had JJProject’s backstory in blsq, so I thought I’d write Markjin’s. This turned out longer than I thought it would be, so it became its own chapter. I wanted this story to be a companion piece to blsq in that it adds to and fills in a few details that serve to (hopefully) enhance the first story, before it takes a different trajectory and becomes its own separate universe.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The start of this chapter coincides with Chapter 2 of blsq with the phone call by Mark, but this is also where the story takes a different path and becomes its own separate universe.

“Are you mad at me?”

“No, I’m not. Or maybe I am.” Mark sighs. “I don’t know anymore, Jinyoung.”

“Okay, yeah… no, I get it… bye.”

When he enters the living room a few minutes later, he sees Jaebum sitting on the couch they rescued from the roadside two years ago. There’s a cooking show on, but the volume is on mute. He wants to smile because he knows Jaebum only has it on that channel because of him, but even a small smile feels like too much work after the phone conversation he had.

“Mark?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah.” He nods, while hoping Jaebum won’t notice how upset he is.

“What’s wrong?”

Of course that had been wishful thinking, Jaebum knows him too well sometimes. _What’s wrong?_ he thinks. _Everything, everything is wrong and I’m not sure how to make it right._ But he doesn’t say any of that, instead, he decides to keep it simple.

“He asked me to go to some party and I said no.” He shrugs to pretend that he doesn’t really care and that things are better than they really are.

“Why aren’t you going? Why have you been staying home so much?”

Just as he’s about to say that he hadn’t wanted to go, his phone whistles alerting him of a new text message. He punches in Jaebum’s birthdate and unlocks his phone. The message is from Mark.

_Can you make it to lunch tomorrow? Jaebum has afternoon class, so it shouldn’t be a problem, right? I think we need to talk._

He reads the message twice, before looking up and catching Jaebum’s worried gaze. He forces himself to smile. “I’m going out tomorrow,” he says. “Mark and I are having lunch.”

—

Jinyoung’s nervous as he follows Mark into the restaurant. Though there’s hardly any other diners present because they came at a non-peak time, Mark requests a table in the far corner for a little extra privacy. Once there, Mark smiles his thanks to the waiter and pulls out Jinyoung’s seat for him before taking his own.

It’s this little hole in the wall Mexican restaurant, one where the outside doesn’t look like much and the interior is relatively sparse but it’s clean and the food is cheap and tastes amazing. Jaebum had actually found the restaurant and taken Jinyoung there first, and in turn, Jinyoung introduced it to Mark.

Small talk is made while they wait to order and for their drinks to be brought to them. It’s not until after their food comes that Mark finally brings up the subject they’ve avoided since arriving. But first, Mark asks, “Are you happy?”

It’s a simple question actually. He’s got great friends, a boyfriend, he’s enrolled at a prestigious university and doing well in his studies, and he’s close with his family. He has so much good going for him in his life, he’s blessed really, but the question still catches him off guard.

“I’m not… not really, not like I should be,” Mark answers his own question before Jinyoung can say anything. “I like Jaebum, I do. And when we got together… well, even before we were official, I knew you two were close friends. Best friends. I wasn’t jealous, not really. At least I didn’t want to be. I tried not to be.”

“I wish you didn’t feel that way. I didn’t want you to.”

“When Jaebum got sick a couple of months ago, you missed an entire week of classes.”

“He would have done the same for me,” Jinyoung answers.

It’s true, Mark doesn’t doubt the truth of Jinyoung’s statement for a minute. But shouldn’t Jinyoung be asking — wanting, expecting him to take care of him when he’s sick since he’s the boyfriend?

“Who is the first person you told when you found out that you won the fall internship for the upcoming school year?” Mark knows the answer but asks the question anyway.

“Jaebum hyung, but he helped me with my application and proofread my essay over two dozen times.”

 _I would have helped you, if you asked_ , he thinks but doesn’t say out loud. “When your mom got into a car accident, who did you call first?”

“It’s Jaebum, but that’s not fair. He’s known my parents forever. He thinks of them as family, and I feel the same way about his parents too.”

“I’m never going to win in a competition with Jaebum on who has known you longer.”

“It’s not a competition, it just is. I can’t change that hyung.” Jinyoung takes his fork and knife and cuts a small bite of his burrito that’s covered in cheese sauce. He’s not hungry, not anymore, but it’s just because it’s there in front of him and it’s something for him to do.

“I know. You both have so many memories and years shared between the two of you, and even if it makes me feel badly sometimes, I respected that. Having a friend for that long, it’s worth something.”

“It is,” Jinyoung agrees, grateful to Mark for acknowledging that. He doesn’t want to feel like he needs to apologize for his friendship with Jaebum.

“I would never ask you to choose between Jaebum and me.” He’s not insecure enough to ask Jinyoung that, but lately, he’s been wondering if that’s actually true. Maybe it’s not just because he thinks that would be wrong of him, maybe it’s more like he’s too afraid of what Jinyoung’s answer would be. “I thought I was a cool enough boyfriend to be okay with always being second place because honestly that’s how it feels. Maybe a bigger, better person would be fine with it, wouldn’t feel lacking… but I don’t think that person is me. Not anymore. I’m sorry.”

Jinyoung wants to scream at Mark that he’s wrong, that this whole conversation is wrong. He wants to tell him that he’s a great person, one of the best he’s ever met. His stomach feels like it wants to reject the food he forced himself to eat earlier, much like the rejection unfolding in front of him, the one he can do nothing to stop. Instead he just sits and listens and watches as everything slowly burns down.

“I’m not there yet, but yeah, in the future I think I could be. I think I could see the white picket fence, the two kids, the dog and cat… suburb or country living with you. PTA meetings, and slumber parties for our kids, and date night Fridays for us….”

The picture that Mark paints is perfect and beautiful, and Jinyoung wants to cry because he sees it being splattered and irreparably ruined in front of his eyes.

“Before I get in too deep that when this falls apart, and it’s going to fall apart. How could it not?” So far, he’s kept the resentment he felt at bay, but from time to time, he could feel it creeping up; a little unwanted, a little welcomed. How much longer would it be before it settles in his heart permanently and starts to take over until the feelings he has for Jinyoung are nothing but a faded memory?

Both their plates of food have long been forgotten, and Jinyoung’s no longer able to stop himself from crying. Out of the corner of his eye, Mark sees the waitress heading their way and he waves her off with a shake of his head.

“I don’t want to hate you, Jinyoung. I think I need to step back. For myself, for you.”

“But what if I don’t want that?” Jinyoung finally speaks. “What if I promise to—” His question remains unfinished in the air between them, because what exactly can he promise? How is he supposed to decide between his best friend and his boyfriend? Mark isn’t asking him to, not out loud or explicitly at least, but still, it feels like he’s stuck at a crossroads and he has to make that decision anyway.

Mark shakes his head. “No, no promises. Just…”

“Just what?” 

“I don’t know. Just think about why when I ask you to stay over at my place, the first thing you think of is texting Jaebum to let him know you won’t be coming back. And why it bothers you so much to think he will be upset with you, and why when I’m upset, it doesn’t seem to hold the same weight to you. Why do you worry so much thinking he’ll be home alone when we go out and do something, just the two of us?” Seeing Jinyoung crying makes his heart hurt, but he can’t keep ignoring how he feels. It’s not fair to either of them. “You owe it to him, to yourself… hell, you owe it to me to figure it out.”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Jinyoung repeats over and over again, as he struggles to control his crying. He doesn’t want to break down like this in front of Mark.

“I’m sorry too.” Maybe in a different universe, things could have worked out and they would have been happy. Maybe he could have been that bigger, better person he had talked about earlier.

There’s muted conversation from patrons several tables away, a clattering noise coming from the kitchen indicating someone had dropped something, and a bell ringing noisily on the door as a couple exits the restaurant, but between the two of them, there’s nothing but silence. The waitress finally comes to clear their plates and to hand Mark their bill, and then they’re alone again.

“Jinyoung,” he murmurs softly. He contemplates a few seconds longer, whether to say anything or not, but in the end, he does because Jinyoung deserves to know why he’s ending things. “I can’t help but see the way Jaebum looks at you sometimes, when he thinks no one else is looking. It’s not in a friendship kind of way.”

Jinyoung looks up at Mark’s words, his face showing his confusion. “No, you’re wrong, hyung. He’s never once—”

Mark smiles ruefully. “I don’t think I am, Jinyoung. If I did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. If I thought I was wrong about… about how it is between you two… maybe it would be different.”

It’s kind of funny in that ironic not-really-funny kind of way that Jinyoung hadn’t wanted Jaebum to feel like a third wheel when all three of them went out together. Because for most of their dating history, Mark felt like a third wheel in his own relationship with Jinyoung.

—

Jinyoung walks around the nearby park for hours, because he’s not ready to go home and try and act like his heart isn’t breaking. He’s received dozens of looks from strangers because he can’t stop crying, but it doesn’t bother him in the least.

Finally he thinks he has it together enough to fake a smile and a short conversation so that Jaebum won’t question him — or if he’s really lucky, Jaebum won’t be home yet — and he can head to the sanctuary of his room and lock the door behind him. Or maybe he’ll head to the bathroom first under the guise of needing a shower, letting the burning hot water cover the sound of his heart bleeding out until the water turns cold and leaves him in a shivering, crying mess on the bathtub floor.

But luck’s not on his side, why should it be? As soon as he walks in the door, Jaebum is there and one look, just one look has him breaking like waves in the ocean. Even knowing he’s alarming his friend doesn’t help, he can’t stop crying long enough to tell him what happened or to lie and say that he’s all right and not to worry.

Jaebum doesn’t ask any questions. He just leads him to the couch, like he’s a doll made of porcelain and he’ll break if Jaebum’s not careful, and wraps him up in his arms. Jinyoung buries his face in Jaebum’s chest and holds onto him tighter and tighter, trying to curl into him, closer and closer, wanting to find warmth and comfort, wanting to shut out everything else in the world but the sound of Jaebum’s steady heartbeat. Jaebum’s murmuring things, things like _it’s okay, shhh it will be all right, I’m here Jinyoung, I’ve got you, I’ve got you… just let it out._ Nothing breaks through to him at first, but eventually the words seep in and through the fog and pain and he feels himself begin to settle a little at a time, his cries subsiding as he breathes in and out one time, two times, three times.

“He broke up with me.”

Jaebum mutters a quiet _fuck_ , before pressing a kiss to the top of Jinyoung’s head. He loosens his hold on Jinyoung and unfurls the younger man from where he’s pressed against him, so that he can frame Jinyoung’s face with his hands, carefully again, sweetly, oh so sweetly, wiping away the tears that mar Jinyoung’s cheeks.

“I didn’t realize he was that big of an idiot,” Jaebum says after a moment, letting his hands fall back to his side. “Who would ever break up with you?”

“I’m not that great you know. Apparently I’m a pretty shitty boyfriend to have.” His nose is runny, his eyes are red and puffy, and oh, God, his head hurts like hell thanks to the fact that he spent his afternoon crying.

“I think you’re amazing.”

Jinyoung looks at Jaebum and though his face is still wet with tears, he smiles his first real smile of the day. It’s more than a little shaky around the edges and it doesn’t quite reach his eyes, but it’s a smile. He can always count on Jaebum to be there for him. For the moment he’s too wrapped up in the immediate hurt of his breakup, but later, he’ll think maybe he should wonder what that means.


	4. Chapter 4

That night Jinyoung barely sleeps, and by morning sunrise, he’s already got his bag packed and waiting for him by the door. He’s in the kitchen now with pen and paper in hand, and after writing a quick note, he places it on the refrigerator door with a magnet touting the local pizza parlor’s promise to deliver a hot-and-fresh pizza in under ten minutes. He wants to be gone before Jaebum wakes up.

But what he wants and what he gets are two very different things.

“Jinyoung?”

Jaebum, his morning voice still heavy with sleep. It’s half past five am.

“Morning, hyung. Did I wake you?” He shouldn’t have taken that shower.

“I was thirsty so I came out to get something to drink,” he says and it’s partly true. He’d seen Jinyoung place something on the refrigerator door, but when he comes closer, Jinyoung steps in front of the appliance, his back pressed against the cold metal. Jaebum frowns, and finally noting that Jinyoung is fully dressed, the thought that something’s wrong multiplies because Jinyoung doesn’t have class until eleven. “What’s going on?”

Instead of answering, he steps to the side and lets Jaebum read the note he planned to leave behind.

“You’re going home?” He spins around toward the door and sees Jinyoung’s small travel suitcase, and then turns once more to look at Jinyoung. “What about school?”

Jinyoung doesn’t say anything.

“I’ll go with you,” Jaebum offers. “But why don’t we wait a couple of days? We both have morning classes Friday, so we can still leave early and make a weekend of our home visit.”

“I want to go today. The class I have is just an elective, it’s not that important. I’ll be back tomorrow in plenty of time to go to my afternoon classes. I just want to see my parents. It’s been too long and I miss them.”

Jaebum sees that Jinyoung has his mind made up and he won’t be able to change it. “All right, give me twenty, thirty minutes to shower and pack.”

“No, don’t.”

“Why not?” _Why are you being so difficult?_ he wants to scream. But he already knows the answer.

“Because you have a big test today. You can’t miss it,” Jinyoung tells him.

It’s true. His professor is strict about the no-makeup test policy (even if you have a legitimate excuse like a hospitalization or death in the family), but the urge to say fuck it and take the zero is strong. “Are you sure you can’t wait until this weekend?” he asks one last time because he can’t stop himself.

Jinyoung shakes his head no.

“Will you at least call and let me know when you get there?”

“Sure, hyung. I can do that.” Jinyoung gives him a small smile, one that rings false and does nothing to convince Jaebum that he’s okay.

“Hey, why don’t we grab breakfast before you head out, since we’re both already up?” The need to do something, anything for Jinyoung, burns hot within him. Even if it’s as simple as making sure he eats something, he still wants to take care of him. “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and—”

“I’m not really hungry.” He feels like he may throw up if he adds anything to his stomach right now. “Besides I just want to get on the road.” It’s a two plus hour train ride, then another thirty minutes by car. He already texted his cousin asking if he could pick him up at the train station later on and his cousin said it wouldn’t be a problem.

“Okay, fine but let me get dressed so I can drop you off at the train station. No arguments,” Jaebum says before Jinyoung can protest. He heads to his room to quickly throw on some clothes, not caring if his shirt’s wrinkled or if his socks are mismatched, too afraid to take any extra time in case Jinyoung leaves without him.

Thirty minutes later, Jinyoung is alone on the train, heading toward the house he once lived in with his parents and sisters. It had been around three in the morning when he decided he wanted to go home. He’s not a kid anymore, far from it, but suddenly he wanted nothing more than to be back in his childhood bed, if only to remind himself of a time before life got complicated and when it was still carefree and _easy_. He wants to hear his mom’s voice in person, not over the phone, and to find comfort in her welcome home hug.

—

He doesn’t call Jaebum when he arrives home, using the excuse that he’s probably busy studying. He texts though, and Jaebum must have had his phone out and waiting for him to call because the response he receives is immediate.

_Tell your parents I said hi, and Jinyoung… take care of yourself. Eat something too._

He types back a simple _okay_ — and he leaves it up to Jaebum to decide which part he’s agreeing with — before setting his phone to vibrate and crawling into bed.

He didn’t sleep much last night and the train ride had been long since he forgot his headphones, so maybe it’s because of that, maybe it’s because the sheets are clean and cool (thanks to his mom’s tendency to wash sheets every other week, even when he’s at school), or maybe it’s because he’s surrounded by the comfort of home again, but whatever it is, before he realizes it, he starts drifting off to dreamland.

When he wakes up, it’s hours later; he’s still half asleep and at first he’s disoriented wondering where he is before remembering that he’s home and remembering the reason he came. He doesn’t want to dwell on that though, so to distract himself, he gets up and out of bed. The LED lights of his bedside clock show that it’s a quarter after one. His mom should be home within the next few hours, and his father should be home by six.

He opens his blinds to let the sunlight filter in and smiles when he looks out into the backyard, remembering all the fun he had (and trouble he got into) with Jaebum when they were young kids. He sees the tree he fell out of when he was nine. He could have been badly injured if Jaebum hadn’t reacted fast and caught him as he came crashing down. Jaebum ended up taking the brunt of the ground’s impact and broke his arm in the process. That summer while everyone else was busy having fun at waterparks and community pools, he kept Jaebum company and supplied with an unlimited amount of comic books and all the chocolate chip cookies he could manage to buy with his allowance money.

Walking away from the window he turns on his bedroom light, feeling nostalgic, as he looks around at all the things that made up his childhood and teen years. There’s a bookcase overflowing with books he read and a few he hadn’t. There are countless pictures in pictures frames that sit on bookcase shelves and on top his dresser, while a couple are framed and hang on walls. Candid snapshots of his family, of Jaebum and him just the two of them together smiling widely with their arms slung around each other’s shoulders, and of Jaebum in photos of Park family gatherings like at Chuseok or Seollal.

There are a dozen trophies and awards, mostly academic related but there are a couple for sports. He had never been a very athletic person, but for a few years, Jaebum had really been into football and joined the team in middle school. He hadn’t wanted to be left out, so he tried out for the team as well. He only did it for a year, because he quickly realized that being knocked breathless and flat on your back wasn’t exactly his idea of fun. The next two years Jaebum played, he joined the team as a statistics and record keeper, that way he still attended each practice and each game, but didn’t have to get tackled over and over again. In high school, he joined the school’s newspaper, and the summer before ninth grade, Jaebum had gotten a camera and became interested in photography (the reason why he has so many photos framed is entirely thanks to Jaebum), so Jaebum joined the staff as a photographer.

He hears the front door opening, successfully pulling him out of his trip down memory lane, and looks at his watch. Today must be his mom’s short work day. Not wanting to startle her, he’s about to yell out and make his presence known when he hears his mother’s voice first.

“Jinyoung? Are you here?”

Not sure how his mom knew he was home, he looks around his room and when he doesn’t see his suitcase, he realizes he must have left it in the living room.

“Hi, mom.” He meets her in the hallway that leads to his bedroom.

“This is the best surprise ever!” his mom says, happiness evident in her voice and in the smile that graces her face. “I didn’t know you were coming home, I would have taken the day off.” She wraps him up in a hug so tight that he can’t breathe properly, before releasing him a full two minutes later. She takes his hand and leads him back to the living room so they can sit down together and talk.

“It’s okay, it was kind of a last minute thing,” he says when they sit down on the sofa. “Brian picked me up at the station, and when I got here, I ended up crashing for a few hours. I just woke up not too long ago.”

“Well, still, you should have told me and—” she stops and frowns, because her brain catches up and reminds her what day it is. It’s not a holiday and it’s not the weekend. “Today’s Wednesday. Jinyoung, why aren’t you in school?”

“Um.” He realizes belatedly that he should have thought up a brilliant or at least a semi-believable excuse to why he’s there and not attending his college class. But because he didn’t and he’s still tired and emotionally drained, he opts for the truth. (Plus he really hates lying to his mother, and he’s bad at it.) “I’m only missing one class, and it’s not an important one.”

“Jinyoung, this isn’t like you. You shouldn’t make this kind of thing a habit either.”

“I won’t,” he promises his mother quickly. “I just… I missed you and dad. I didn’t want to wait until the weekend.”

Her baby looks sad. She hadn’t seen it at first, because she’d been so excited and happy to see him that she hadn’t noticed much else, but now looking at him, it’s more than obvious. To be fair, he’s trying hard not to let it show, but she’s his mother and she knows her son. He wouldn’t have come home unannounced in the middle of the week unless something’s really bothering him, and that right there, that worries her. She doesn’t want to push further, not right now; she’ll give him a little time and breathing space first. “I always miss you,” she says and smiles as she pulls her son into another quick, tight hug. He looks like he needs it. “Have you eaten?”

—

It’s well past dinner time and after his father turns in for the night when his mom knocks on his partially opened door.

He gives her a welcoming smile and closes the book he’d been reading, or trying to read since he’s been on the same page for the last ten minutes.

“Do you want to tell me the real reason you came home? Or am I going to have to guess?”

He should have known she wouldn’t accept his earlier answer of missing home. He hadn’t planned on telling her about the breakup, at least that hadn’t been his original plan when he decided to take a train back home; eventually it would come out of course but for the moment he just wanted to be here.

His mom fully enters his room and takes a seat near the bottom of his bed. He sits up, using a couple pillows to lean back against his headboard, and he grabs his phone to check the time and avoid the questioning look in his mother’s eyes. “I was homesick.”

“You could have called anytime, or we could have done that video chat Swype thing you’re so fond of.”

“Skype?” He looks up at that and gives his mother a small amused smile. His mom embraces technology but she still gets a little confused on the terminology of things.

“Swype, Skype it all sounds the same to me. Jinyoung, honey… talk to me, tell me what’s wrong.”

His mom’s voice, soft, sweet and so full of love and concern. It’s the worry in her voice that gets to him the most, and he’s tired of pretending that he’s all right so before he knows it, the entire story spills forth until there’s nothing left to say except, “It hurts.” He doesn’t cry, he did enough of that the day before, enough to last a lifetime.

“I know it does,” she murmurs softly. She met Mark once when she visited Jinyoung. Her son had been head over heels in like with the older boy. Like, not love. Mark had been his first boyfriend, and it’s easy to mix up emotions when everything is new and bright. She hadn’t said anything, because she thought perhaps maybe she could be wrong, or that the like could turn to love. And if it didn’t, it was something Jinyoung needed to go through and experience on his own. Of course as his mother, all she really wants to do is wrap him up in a protective bubble to keep him from ever getting hurt, but that’s not possible and it’s not fair and it’s not actually _living_ so it’s something she has to learn and accept. “Mark’s a perfectly nice young man. Soft and kind spoken, well mannered, charming—”

“He was, all that and more,” he interrupts his mom, agreeing.

“But Jinyoung, I think it was right for Mark to break things off. I know it hurts and you can’t see it now, but I think what he did showed great maturity on his part.”

“He was my first boyfriend.”

“I know.”

“I loved him.”

“Did you?” she quietly questions her son. “I know you cared for him a lot, but was it love?”

“I said it.”

“It’s easy to genuinely care about someone and mistake our feelings for something more. We can say things without realizing the true meaning of the word.”

Jinyoung says nothing for a few moments, just stares blankly down at his hands. The random thought that he needs to clip his nails comes to his mind before he looks back up at his mom and asks, “How do you know then? That it’s love.”

“It may sound cliched but when it’s love, you just know.” She smiles thinking about his father, her first and last love. “Everything falls into place and it’s like two puzzle pieces fitting together.”

Jinyoung makes a face of dissatisfaction at his mom’s answer. He wanted something simple, not abstract. “We had fun together. I liked hanging out with him.”

“Can you imagine your life without that person in it? Is that person someone that you can see always being there and always supporting you no matter what happens? And is that person’s happiness just as important to you as your own?”

“I don’t know,” he replies honestly, feeling for the first time completely lost. “I thought I was happy, that we were happy together. For a while at least.”

“I think you had fun together and that’s great. But things aren’t always meant to last.” She sighs, because she hates seeing her son go through the heartache and pain of a breakup and learning that love isn’t always simple or easy.

His phone vibrates on the nightstand where he laid it earlier and provides a distraction. He grabs and unlocks it and sees a message from Jaebum asking if he’s still coming back tomorrow. A second text comes in while he’s still got his phone in his hand. This time, it’s Jaebum saying he’ll skip his Friday classes if he doesn’t see him back at the apartment Thursday. Truthfully being back home, he realizes how much he had missed his mom and dad and he wants to stay a few more days. It’s not running away, he doesn’t think so, it’s just… taking a bit of a time out. But he also believes Jaebum really will skip classes and he doesn’t want that, and he knows he needs to go back for academic reasons. He has an upcoming test next week and he has to attend his Thursday class if he wants to receive the study guide for it.

“Jaebum,” he tells his mom, turning his phone screen off without replying. He’ll text back later. “He just wanted to see if I would be coming back tomorrow.”

“That’s nice,” his mom says. “You are planning to return to school tomorrow, right? You shouldn’t keep missing classes.”

“I know, and yes I plan to.”

She spends a few moments in silent debate, trying to decide whether or not to say anything, but Jinyoung had already mentioned that Mark had broke up with him because of Jaebum. He hadn’t said it explicitly but she could read between the lines that her son spoke. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to put it out there and see how Jinyoung reacts.

“You know when you first told me you were dating someone, I thought it would be Jaebum.”

“Jaebum hyung?”

She nods. “I always thought you two would end up together.”

This is the second time in as many days that someone has talked about Jaebum and him together together. “Why didn’t you say anything before?” is the only response he can come up with.

“I didn’t think you were ready.”

His mother’s answer confuses him. “What do you mean by that? Ready for what?”

“For love. I think when you’re ready for it and open to it, the love you want… it will find you. Maybe it’s already there and you haven’t realized it yet. When you’re ready to see it, it’ll be there waiting for you.” She smiles and gets up to give her son one more hug and kisses him on the cheek. “But what do I know? I’m just your mom.”

“You’re the best mom,” Jinyoung tells her, giving her a kiss good night. “I love you.”

“I know, I love you too.” She yawns and heads toward the door. “Tomorrow your dad is going to drive you to the train station before he goes to work, but I’ll make you breakfast before you two head out.”

Once his mom leaves, he stares at the closed door, thinking of all the things she said. His phone buzzes again and he picks it up.

Jaebum.

A picture of their dining room table with two bowls and two pairs of chopsticks set out, one bowl filled with ramyun, the other empty. He captions the picture with three simple words.

_I miss you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally planned a phone call between Jinyoung and his mom, but that didn’t feel right. A 200+ word phone convo turned into a 3000+ words chapter all of its own. I hadn’t intended to go further into the JJProject backstory that I set up in Ch1 of blsq but this provided the perfect opportunity to do that when Jinyoung went home, so I hope you enjoyed the extra glimpses of JJP growing up together and their bond.


	5. Chapter 5

Jaebum comes home to find Jinyoung wrapped up in his comforter on the sofa and staring off into space, which is more than a little inappropriate considering it’s summertime in New York City. Pictures flicker and dance across the TV screen but no sound is emitted. It’s been a week since Jinyoung’s impromptu home visit, and since then, he’s attended each and every class. But when he returns to their shared apartment he heads to his room, staying there until Jaebum nags him (or drags him) to come out to the living room or to the kitchen table. The only time he eats is when Jaebum places food in front of him, otherwise he doesn’t think of it himself. Jaebum’s not known for his culinary skills, so for Jinyoung’s sake he orders takeout most of the time or relies on the three college classics: cereal, ramyun, and frozen burritos.

The whole thing pisses him off enough to do something entirely stupid. Like go see the jackass who broke his best friend’s heart.

Stupid, so entirely stupid, because he learns that maybe it isn’t Mark’s fault after all. Not entirely, because it seems the reason Mark broke up with Jinyoung is because of him. Instead of being angry and wanting to punch Mark in the face — though to be honest, that urge is still strong — he realizes that the person he needs to be mad at is himself. He’s the reason his best friend is hurting and he hates it.

He’s still standing in the entryway, not sure what he should say or do now, but then Jinyoung glances up and sees that he’s back home again and Jaebum quickly closes the distance between them to take a seat on the sofa next to Jinyoung.

It’s not fair to his heart that Jinyoung looks so incredibly fragile wrapped up in his blanket, because all it does is kick his protective instincts into overdrive. Jinyoung is and always will be his greatest weakness. He carried a Superman lunchbox in second grade when he first met Jinyoung, so it’s almost fitting, and maybe a little poetic, to think of Jinyoung as his Kryptonite.

“Where did you go?”

It’s the first time Jinyoung has initiated conversation in the last week. It’s been Jaebum who has filled silences and tried his best to draw Jinyoung into talking, asking him about his school day or what he wanted to eat or did he want to watch the new Chopped episode on TV?

“I went to see Mark,” he answers, then mentally kicks himself the next second thinking maybe he shouldn’t have brought Mark’s name up, not yet.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

One word replies and then nothing.

“Hyung, do you like me?” Jinyoung asks. His voice is soft, like him, and barely heard over the sound of the air conditioner running in the background.

He’s thought about a lot of things lately, but it’s the one question that his mind kept circling around and back to no matter what. For some people, the quiet can be a dangerous time, but Jinyoung welcomed it freely, needing, wanting to have the chance to think without interruption or distraction. He replayed his last conversation with Mark, his conversation with his mother; he thought back to meeting and dating Mark, their relationship; he thought about meeting and growing up together with Jaebum, their friendship.

Mark had been his first boyfriend. He had a couple of crushes before, nothing serious or that turned into a relationship. Maybe that’s why he fell so fast. He cared about Mark, he knows he did — he’s not going to rewrite history and pretend those months didn’t mean anything. He loved him, but maybe he hadn’t really been in love with him. Not like he should have been, not like the love that could last a lifetime, not like the love his parents shared.

He knows he’s worried Jaebum, because he’s been spending so much time by himself; and definitely because of that first day when Mark broke up with him, Jaebum hadn’t seen him cry like that since sophomore year of high school when his grandfather passed away. The solitude had been a good thing; he needed the time to sort through his thoughts. Now (he thinks) he’s ready to hear Jaebum’s answer.

_Jaebum, do you like Jinyoung?_

The question is one he’s been asked many times (jokingly, always) over the years, and Jaebum has always hated it and thought it was stupid. Jinyoung himself had asked it a couple times before, but it had always been said with a teasing tone and accompanied by a mischievous grin. Because to Jinyoung Park it had been the most obvious thing in the world that Jaebum Im, his best friend forever, liked him.

But now, this time when it’s asked aloud, it’s different. There’s no teasing glint in Jinyoung’s eyes and his face holds no hint of playfulness.

The answer to the question is an easy one for Jaebum, he doesn’t need to think twice about it. It’s as automatic as breathing to him.

“Yes, I do,” he answers honestly.

“Oh.” Jinyoung realizes that’s not good enough, he needs the clarification because this is too important to have any misunderstandings between them. “Do you like me in the I-want-to-be-your-boyfriend kind of way?”

One tiny tiny beat of a pause that seems to stretch out into a lifetime, because this _this_ changes everything. It’s scary and terrifying opening up what feels like pandora’s box, not knowing what will happen. “Yes.”

“Oh,” Jinyoung says again and reverts back to silence and hibernating under his blanket, attempting to wrap it tighter and tighter around himself.

“Do you want me to move out?” The question is on the tip of his tongue and falls from his lips before he can take it back. “Do you hate me because I’m the reason Mark and you broke up?” It actually physically pains him to ask because he’s not sure if he can handle Jinyoung hating him. He doesn’t even realize that he’s been holding his breath until he hears Jinyoung’s reply.

“Don’t be an idiot, hyung.”

The breath rushes out.

“I’m trying not to be, but I don’t know what to do here. I hate seeing you like this. I—my feelings, I’m not asking you to return them. If it makes you uncomfortable, I can start looking for a new place, or—”

“Jaebum hyung, I’m okay.” At Jaebum’s disbelieving look, he repeats it firmly, hoping if he says it enough the words will float up into the universe and become a reality. “I’m going to be okay. I just had things on my mind and you know how I can get, I have a tendency to withdraw into myself sometimes.”

Over the course of the past week, he’s done nothing but think and wonder if maybe Mark and his mom weren’t crazy, and it was he who really was clueless. Now after hearing Jaebum’s confirmation, he realizes quite belatedly that maybe he isn’t fully prepared for the changes that the truth will bring.

Ignorance is bliss is a cliche for a reason. And it’s something he can no longer claim.

From this moment forward, nothing will be the same again. The pieces — of their friendship, their history together — cannot fall back into place again, not in the same way, not with this new knowledge. Finally knowing the answer to the question that’s plagued him, what does that mean to him? Learning about Jaebum’s feelings, does that make him happy or apologetic? He’s always thought of Jaebum as his best friend, and now that there’s romantic feelings thrown into the relationship mix, how is he supposed to react?

He loves Jaebum, he’s said it plenty of times drunk and sober alike, but he’s always meant it in a friends-only kind of way. Are his feelings truly just friendship-based and always will be, or is there more there and he hasn’t realized it yet?

There are countless examples in books and on TV and in movies where one friend confesses their heart to the other, and the other friend returns their affection the next scene. It makes for a nice little story, but that’s fiction, not real life.

He can’t give Jaebum an answer about his feelings, not yet, not when he doesn’t know them himself. He doesn’t even know how Jaebum’s confession makes him feel.

Jaebum said he’s not asking (or expecting) him to return his feelings, but now that Jinyoung knows about them, he can’t disregard them completely and pretend this conversation never took place. Whether or not he can accept and reciprocate them or if he will end up having to say thank you and sorry in the next breath, he has to figure it out and consider it for the sake of their friendship and because Jaebum is important to him. Jaebum may not be asking for an answer back, but he deserves one.

“Can you give me some time?”

He doesn’t specify why, and Jaebum doesn’t ask.

“Yeah, whatever you need or want.” Jaebum is willing to promise him anything, if only he can make Jinyoung happy.

“I’m not uncomfortable around you,” Jinyoung murmurs softly, lifting his head from where it’s half buried underneath the covers to meet Jaebum’s gaze.

“I’m glad.”

“And I’m going to be super pissed if you start acting weird around me,” Jinyoung warns him. “I just lost a boyfriend, so I better not lose my best friend. If I do, I’m going to hunt you down and kick your ass.”

Truthfully Jinyoung’s glare loses some of its menace, considering the fact that he’s currently ensconced in his bed comforter like a caterpillar awaiting its metamorphosis but that doesn’t matter at all. Jaebum lets out a small choke of laughter, while the feelings of relief and gratitude wash over and overwhelm him.

After a few moments and more than a little hesitation on his part — _is this okay?, is it too soon?_ — he follows his heart and shifts inches closer to Jinyoung. Jinyoung starts for a second, surprised, and then Jaebum hears a sigh followed by the feeling of Jinyoung resting his head on Jaebum’s shoulder.

It’s quiet, peaceful, and (bitter)sweet.

“I know it’s selfish of me to ask this of you,” Jinyoung whispers softly sometime later. _It’s a lot selfish_ , he admits silently. Knowing that, realizing that, he still can’t help but ask anyway. “Please don’t leave me.”

Jaebum understands Jinyoung’s no longer referring just to this moment.

“Never,” Jaebum answers confidently. “I would never.” _I could never leave you._ “You don’t need to worry about that.”

__

It takes them a little bit of time to settle back into the rhythm of being Jinyoung and Jaebum, best friends since second grade.

Jaebum seems to handle it well (at least by outward appearances), but then again, maybe it’s because he’s so use to compartmentalizing his feelings and trying to keep them hidden from Jinyoung that ignoring the confession conversation is child’s play for him.

For Jinyoung, it’s a different story altogether.

It’s weird — for lack of a better word — for him because he’s known Jaebum for most of his life, and Jaebum is his best best friend. That’s how he’s thought of him. This new knowledge keeps his feelings and his thoughts all jumbled and confused. He told Jaebum he would be mad at him if he started acting strange around him, but Jinyoung finds that it’s he who has to work on acting normal.

They’ve seen each other at their best, at their worst moments, and every time in between.

They’ve seen each other in all various stages of being undressed; they’ve jumped into the freezing cold lake in the middle of winter — Jaebum begged to borrow the family car so they could winter camp during Christmas break — on a dare without any clothing on and then shared a sleeping bag to conserve warmth, laughing at their complete stupidity while sincerely hoping that they didn’t permanently damage or cause frostbite to any essential parts.

The first time they drank, when they were seventeen (the same year as their not-so-brilliant jump-in-the-lake naked idea), they skipped school to return home and raided both their parents’ liquor cabinets. They got completely trashed to the point of hugging the porcelain throne and lying on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor for hours, shirtless because it was hot and their aim wasn’t very good. They stretched out side-by-side with Jinyoung’s head and hand resting on Jaebum’s chest, and with their eyes closed (the room refused to stay still) they made promises to each other. Some were made to be broken (never to drink again), some were made to be kept and guarded carefully (to always be best friends).

They’ve talked sex, porn, and having your mom catch you with your hand wrapped around your dick and then giving you an hour long sex-ed talk that made you want to dig your own hole to crawl into for the next half century to erase those memories.

The first time they kissed — it was just a short peck on the lips, barely lasting two seconds — was when they were eleven and curious about what it would feel like. They kissed and then spent the rest of the afternoon cracking themselves up over and over and teasing the other one about their complete lack of skills and chapped lips and coming up with super lame insults like no one’s going to ever want to kiss you because you’re such a frog face.

All that’s happened and more, and yet, when Jinyoung catches Jaebum coming out of the shower with a towel slung dangerously low around his hips, it makes him lose all train of thought and he turns and runs away to his room, slamming the door shut before he can embarrass himself by doing something crazy like throwing himself at Jaebum.

The quiet and silence and dark is actually a dangerous thing he learns, because it’s late at night that he can’t stop thinking about Jaebum and his thoughts would make even a stripper blush twenty shades of red.

Yes, they’re back to being Jinyoung and Jaebum, or as they use to call themselves in middle and high school when they worked together on school assignments: JJ Project.

The extra knowledge, the potential feelings, float around and in between each and every conversation and look and touch; ignored and shoved forcefully away again and _again_. There’s a little (a lot of) sexual tension and attraction that ignite the air between them so hot and fast that in some moments Jinyoung’s surprised it doesn’t burn them. But the moments come and go without either of them acknowledging it, choosing to throw water on the flames before it consumes them both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wanting a breakup to immediate hookup, sorry that was never my plan. (And Mark still returns.) I didn’t plan on writing more JJP backstory, but I have to be honest, I’m having so much fun with it. These two idiots, I love them sfm.


	6. Chapter 6

They don’t start dating right away, or anytime soon. Jinyoung feels that would have been disrespectful to his relationship with Mark and with trying to start a relationship with Jaebum. He never wants Jaebum to feel like he was the rebound guy, that he was using him to get over Mark.

It’s five months, one week, and six days since Mark broke up with him before Jinyoung asks Jaebum out. They’re sitting on the sofa, their sofa, watching some random cooking show where the contestants are competing to become the next network’s star and it’s a commercial when he asks. He doesn’t turn to face Jaebum fully or reach to turn down the TV volume; it’s just a casual asking of a question like you would ask if it’s going to rain that day or do you want ramyun for a late-night study snack.

“Will you go out with me Friday night?”

“Of course,” Jaebum answers, glancing over at him with an amused smile, since it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“No, not like our usual hanging out…”

“Did you want to go somewhere new?”

“No, or well, I don’t care. I meant do you want to go out with me Friday night as in a _dategoingout_?” The last few words he says so fast they kind of blur together, much like how his mind feels right now. Nervous doesn’t begin to cover what’s bubbling deep inside of him, because what if Jaebum no longer feels the same way about him? He asked for time, sure, but Jaebum hadn’t said one word about liking _liking_ him since then or made any kind of move toward him, and oh, God, what if he’s screwing their friendship up again, or worse permanently?

Maybe he needs to quickly laugh and apologize and pretend what he said had been nothing more than a joke.

He knows it’s taken him a while to get to this point, this step. He had hurt Mark by confusing emotions and rushing into things, and he doesn’t want to hurt anyone else, especially not Jaebum. He needed to take the time for himself to be sure of his feelings and to think about what starting a relationship with Jaebum meant.

It’s true what his mom said when she spoke about love, because he cannot imagine his life without Jaebum in it.

“You’re asking me out on a date?” Jaebum asks, reaching for the remote to turn the TV volume down before giving Jinyoung his full attention.

Jinyoung nods slowly and tries not to give into the (very real) temptation to run away. It takes less than two seconds for him to be glad that he stays because Jaebum starts smiling and then he smiles back and they probably look like idiots with the two biggest grins on their faces but it doesn’t matter at all.

The only thing that matters is the two of them, right here, right in this very moment, and this new beginning they’re creating.

“I would love to go out with you Friday night. But can you do something for me first?”

“Sure,” he agrees immediately, although he can’t imagine what Jaebum will ask.

Jaebum holds out his arm. “Pinch me, so I know this isn’t a dream.”

A small laugh escapes from Jinyoung’s mouth and he reaches over and pinches Jaebum’s cheek instead, making Jaebum murmur a soft ow and causing Jinyoung to laugh again. “This is not a dream,” he says in a flat monotone voice. He repeats it once more in a regular voice and then asks, “Satisfied?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

Jaebum notices the show’s back on and punches the volume button until the sound is audible again. For the next twenty minutes, they try (and fail) to pay attention to the cooking challenge unfolding on screen. Both of them choose instead to not-so-secretly steal glances at the other and when caught, they end up laughing at themselves before returning their attention to the TV again. It’s never long before their eyes wander back to each other though.

It’s at the end of the episode when Jaebum finally gets up the courage to ask the one thing he’s wanted to since Jinyoung asked him out on a date.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Did you seriously just ask if you can kiss me?”

Jaebum refuses to be embarrassed, but that doesn’t stop the warmth from heating up his cheeks. “I’m trying to be a gentleman and—”

“I asked you out though, so—”

“Yes, I know and I’m happy.” Happy doesn’t even begin to cover how he actually feels — is there even a word created that could come close to encompassing all the emotions he’s feeling? Later he plans to lie in bed replaying the conversation over and over again before he falls asleep dreaming of Jinyoung and their future together. “That doesn’t mean you’re ready to do that… with me.”

Why is he so nervous? He stares at Jinyoung, his best friend, the person he’s been in love with forever, the person who is undoubtedly the most important person to him in the entire world — no, the entire galaxy and realms and everything beyond infinity — and he sees Jinyoung staring back at him with an amused expression on his face and yes that’s why he’s nervous. Because this is Jinyoung, because this is something he’s wanted and hoped for and never thought he could actually have, and it’s right here, right here in front of him, and it’s in his reach and it’s amazing and wonderful and so fucking terrifying. All he wants to do is to reach out and grasp onto this moment tightly, this start of something new, and never let it go.

“You are the best,” Jinyoung says and then takes matters into his own hands because God knows he’s wanted this for a while. He kisses Jaebum once, twice, murmuring, “Yes, please do,” against Jaebum’s mouth before kissing him over and over just to make sure he understands that kissing is more than welcomed. “Anytime, anywhere.”

This person who is his best friend, who he thought he knew everything about, it’s a heady sensation to realize there are still so many new layers to discover. The way his lips feel and move against his, the way Jaebum gasps when he bites his lower lip and the way Jaebum moans when his tongue darts out to soothe the injured spot before slipping inside his mouth. His hands find their way into Jaebum’s hair, pulling him closer and closer, and Jaebum, fuck Jaebum, makes up for wasted time and pulls him into his lap with Jinyoung’s knees straddling his thighs.

This feeling, this is the piece that Jinyoung didn’t even realize was missing from his life, not until this moment with Jaebum’s lips on his and their bodies pressed together like they were made for each other.

Puzzle pieces is the last thing he thinks before he gives himself over to Jaebum and to the rising storm of emotions and feelings that Jaebum creates inside of him.

—

Jinyoung is thankful for Jaebum, always being there for him no matter what, and sorry to Jaebum, for not realizing his feelings sooner and seeing the truth hidden in Jaebum’s actions and words.

His mother was right about love, about how when you were ready it would come and find you. It had been right in front of him the entire time, but he hadn’t seen it. He thinks of the saying that you can’t see the forest for the trees. Jaebum had always been there for him, had always been his best friend, and that’s what he knew and expected.

Calling Jaebum his best friend forever and their memories together, he appreciated and cherished all the moments, but he can’t help but feel that he took Jaebum for granted in a way, even though he hadn’t meant to or wanted to.

“Thank you,” he murmurs quietly one night. They’re lying down on their sofa, his back against Jaebum’s chest while one of Jaebum’s arms is wrapped loosely around his waist. He reaches for Jaebum’s hand and brings it to his lips to press a kiss to the palm of his hand. “Thank you for never giving up and waiting for me.”

“Giving up was never an option.” It doesn’t matter if it’s a different reality or alternate universe, Jaebum knows he would always be in love with Jinyoung. Some things are meant to never change, some things transcend everything else.

—

He asks Jaebum not to say the ‘L’ word, at least not yet. He had said the words to Mark, and he thought he had meant them at the time. He had in a way, but not in the right way. This time, this relationship is precious and he wants to do everything he can to protect it.

Jaebum agrees but that doesn’t stop him from getting frustrated sometimes, saying that he felt like he’d been waiting a lifetime already to say those words to him. Each and every time Jinyoung would respond by leaning forward, lacing their fingers together, and kissing him softly, murmuring an “I know” against his lips. “Soon,” he’d say, pulling back, “soon I promise.” Another kiss and finally, “Thank you hyung.”

The fifth time Jaebum gets frustrated, it scares Jinyoung.

He realizes later that maybe he purposely went a little too far, pushed a little too hard to see what Jaebum’s reaction would be. He gets his answer when in the middle of their disagreement Jaebum turns on his heels and leaves without another word or a backward glance. The sound of the door slamming shut makes Jinyoung want to break and cry but the tears are stuck, much like how his heart feels in his throat. He barely makes it to the sofa, their sofa, and he thinks numbly that his greatest fear is about to be realized, that this was the end, that Jaebum would wake up and realize that he wasn’t worth it anymore, that he wasn’t worth it in the first place.

His phone lies forgotten on the coffee table until he hears the unmistakable sound of an incoming text. He grabs it and his hands shake so much that he drops it once and enters his password wrong twice. The message is from Jaebum.

_I’m sorry, I didn’t want to say something I’d regret later._

Another text, a second later.

_I’ll be back soon._

And when Jaebum returns, he has flowers in his hands but Jinyoung doesn’t care because all his mind registers is that Jaebum came back. The flowers fall forgotten to the ground as Jaebum’s hands settle on his hips and Jinyoung’s arms circle around Jaebum’s neck, and he’s kissing him and apologizing and he’s crying, the tears that refused to come earlier flow freely now. He doesn’t realize he’s crying though, not until Jaebum breaks their kiss to gently wipe away the tears with the soft pad of his thumb before kissing his tear-stained cheeks and then recapturing his lips in a sweet kiss of apology and unspoken words.

“It’s okay, I’m here. I’m not leaving you, Jinyoung.”

He can’t even answer properly, instead he sniffles and wipes his face with the back of his shirt sleeve.

“I’m sorry.” Jaebum takes his hand in his and pulls him down to the sofa with him. “I don’t want to fight with you. I don’t like it.”

“I don’t either.”

“I promise next time I won’t leave. If I need to take a minute or step away, I’ll go to my room or something but I won’t leave. Not ever again.”

Jinyoung nods and like a child needing comfort, he crawls into Jaebum’s lap and pulls his boyfriend’s arms around him to hold him tight. It’s quiet for a few moments and then he finally finds the courage to say what he’s been feeling. “I’m scared.”

Jaebum tightens his hold on Jinyoung. “Why?”

“I’m scared of messing this up. I’m scared because I lo— because sometimes I look at you and I can’t breathe. My feelings for you, they overwhelm me.” He’s glad he can’t see Jaebum’s face at the moment, choosing instead to stare at the wall in front of him, because it’s easier to get the words out without seeing what he knows will be reflected in Jaebum’s eyes. “You are my most important person and what if something happens… what if you stop feeling that way about me… Jaebum hyung, I’ve let you in… honestly, you’ve always been here,” he murmurs, as he places a hand over his heart, “but this… it’s different.”

“I know,” Jaebum agrees softly. “I’m scared too,” he admits. “But I’m here, I’m not going anywhere and my feelings are never going to change. You can drive yourself crazy thinking about what if scenarios all day long. There are no guarantees in life Jinyoung. Life doesn’t work that way. But if I was a gambling man, I’d bet on us every single time.”


	7. Chapter 7

It’s in the middle of the most mundane afternoon ever created in the universe that Jinyoung turns to Jaebum and simply says one word. “Now.”

They’ve just moved to a little house off campus, it’s a rental but the property terms are less strict than the apartment rules they had to follow, which is why they’re currently painting their bedroom wall.

It’s summertime and the windows are open to provide extra ventilation and because it’s a beautiful day outside. There’s a steady breeze and the sun is shining brightly in a cloudless blue sky. Faint echoes of cars honking in the far off distance can be heard, signaling impatient cabbies and New York drivers alike, while birds sit in nearby trees singing nature’s melodies.

Jaebum is painting out their initials with a heart in between, like carving in a tree, before rolling over it with a solid coat of paint. Jinyoung has learned that Jaebum can be super cheesy romantic and it’s all kinds of adorable. And he secretly — not so secretly? — loves it.

He stops mid-roll and glances over at his boyfriend who has stopped painting. “Now? You want sex now?” He looks around the room, sees the three cans of paint, the rolling brushes and trays, the fan in the corner and the plastic tarp on the floor. “Okay.”

Jinyoung laughs, picking up a clean paint roller cover to throw at him. “No, I didn’t mean it that way. You are ridiculous.”

“Yeah, but you lo—” Jaebum starts to tease _you love me anyway_ , but realizing what he’s about to say, he stops before completing the thought and turns his attention to painting again to try and cover the moment, like it never happened.

Jinyoung closes the distance between them in five steps and takes the paint roller from Jaebum’s hand, placing it back down on the tray. He turns Jaebum around until they’re facing each other. “The words you wanted to say…” He pauses, to take a calming breath. His voice isn’t as steady as he wants it to be, but figures considering circumstances, it’s okay. “I would like to hear them now. I think I’m ready.”

For a few seconds, Jaebum says nothing and then he starts to laugh so hard that Jinyoung is surprised he doesn’t have tears streaming down his face. This reaction isn’t what he expected at all.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Jaebum tries to rein in his laughter. “It’s perfect, you are perfect.” There’s a huge grin on his face and it’s infectious and Jinyoung finds himself smiling back, though a little uncertainly because he still doesn’t understand what’s so funny.

“Care to explain why it’s so perfect?” Jinyoung’s also fully aware that Jaebum hasn’t said those three little words to him — words he didn’t realize he wanted to hear so badly until this very moment.

“It’s perfect because here we are painting our bedroom, I’m wearing a pair of athletic shorts and an old tank top and you’re wearing an oversized t-shirt of mine.” The t-shirt that all afternoon kept sliding off Jinyoung’s shoulder, distracting him with glimpses of soft skin and the marks he made last night still evident in daylight. “Because I don’t know, Jinyoung, when I thought of all the possible scenarios when I would finally say those words to you, it would be in a romantic setting… I’d just taken you out to eat, or I made a candlelight dinner here for us—”

“Wait, you cook now?” Jinyoung interrupts, not able to resist teasing his boyfriend over his lack of culinary skills.

Jaebum figures it’d be way too childish to stick his tongue out at Jinyoung. “This is my fantasy, just go with it. And stop interrupting.”

He nods, biting his bottom lip to keep his smile from turning to laughter as he works hard to look properly chastised. “Yes, hyung. Please continue.”

“As I was trying to say, this was not it. But this is,” he pauses and makes sure he’s looking straight at Jinyoung as he says the next few words, “this is why I love you. It doesn’t matter the time, place, or setting, as long as you are with me, it’s special. I love you, Jinyoung Park. I love waking up next to you in the morning as you try to rush me out the door so I won’t be late to class, and I love distracting you in the shower and making us both late… I love seeing you get dressed up when we go out somewhere nice and I love your habit of borrowing my clothes. I love our conversations and that we can sit in silence and not feel the need to fill it. I love taking care of you and having you there by my side to do the same. I love evenings spent cuddling on the couch, before I pick you up and take you back to our bed to make love. Your body next to mine is all the warmth I’ll ever need. I love that I can say these things to you finally, and I love that I can call you mine.”

“Wow, you’ve been saving a lot.” He makes a light joke but only because he’s indescribably moved by Jaebum’s words. Never has he ever felt this way before. Jaebum makes him feel like he is the most precious person in the world. It’s a scary feeling to realize how essential another person is to your own existence, how entwined their happiness is with your own. It’s scary and wonderful and amazing and he is lucky, so incredibly lucky and blessed to know this feeling and to have it.

“Those are just the highlights,” Jaebum says smiling and takes a step closer to Jinyoung, circling his waist with his arms.

“Will you promise me something?”

“Anything, you know that. As long as you never ask me to leave you. I can’t do that.”

“Never,” Jinyoung agrees and wraps his arms around Jaebum’s neck. He can’t live without this man standing in front of him. “Promise me that you’ll keep telling me you love me? Because I promise to never get tired of hearing it. I love you, Jaebum Im. You are my best friend, and you are and will always be the best part of my life. I love you and I’m thankful every day that I can call you mine.”

“I’ve always been yours, always will be,” Jaebum softly murmurs and leans down to seal his promise of forever in a kiss.

—  
 It’s December in New York and snow flurries swirl and float in the air before lightly dusting sidewalks and rooftops. The streets and shop windows are festively decorated, even if most native New Yorkers are too busy rushing here and there to fully appreciate the spirit and magic of the season.

It’s their second Christmas together as a couple, but in a way it feels more like their first, since they started dating only a couple of weeks before Christmas last December. This year, everything feels a little more special, a little brighter and more joyful. They are riding high on the exhilarating feeling of being in love and feeling confident and comfortable in their relationship.

They’re out shopping, mainly just window shopping and browsing through random little places to see if they come across anything interesting.

Thanks to the weather outside, they’re wearing layers of clothing, all bundled up in winter gear, but still their noses remain bright and red. “Rudolph Park,” Jaebum jokes before stopping Jinyoung and rearranging his scarf to better cover his face.

Jaebum notices a sign for a vintage bookstore first and pulls Jinyoung forward, knowing the younger man would want to stop in and look around for a bit. Although he’s not an avid reader like Jinyoung, he doesn’t mind spending time with Jinyoung as he goes through countless rows and stacks of books, reading titles and pulling out books randomly. Jinyoung likes to find books that are worn out and old, tearing apart at the binding and seams, always flipping open the first few pages to see if there is an inscription hiding inside and waiting to be found. When there is, his face lights up as he reads the words out loud to Jaebum. “There’s history here,” he says and traces the letters penned almost reverently. Often he comes up with and creates stories of when the people were alive (if there’s no date) and their relationship to each other — Jaebum joins him sometimes, adding in his own thoughts — and then he thinks about how many hands the book passed through, how many miles it may have traveled, before ending up on the shelf in front of them.

 It’s three shops later and they’re at a music store (Jaebum’s choice) in the back where the vinyl selection is kept. Jaebum flips through different sections haphazardly: neo soul, r&b, foreign. He thinks it would be cool to start collecting vinyls, but he sees no point in starting a collection without a player first, and for the time being, he’s focused on putting money back for another type of purchase.

“You know, you may not get any presents this year,” Jinyoung teases, hoping to distract Jaebum from his current search since there are still two weeks before Christmas and he doesn’t want to have to explicitly tell his boyfriend why he shouldn’t be looking in the vinyl section. He wants Jaebum to be completely surprised when he opens his gifts this year, a record player along with a signed vinyl copy of D’Angelo’s _Brown Sugar_.

“Why not?” he asks, looking amused at Jinyoung’s randomness.

“I think you’re on Santa’s naughty list.”

“Oh, really now?” Jaebum grabs Jinyoung and backs him up to the nearest wall that’s not lined with records (a door with a sign reading Employees Only). “You weren’t complaining last night,” he whispers into Jinyoung’s ear.

Jinyoung laughs and wraps a hand around Jaebum’s neck to bring his face back into view. He kisses him then, lips moving softly against Jaebum’s, not caring that at any moment someone could stumble upon them making out. “I love you.”

The words come naturally now for both of them, and no matter how many times Jaebum hears Jinyoung say the words, he still feels the same rush of happiness that he did the first time Jinyoung said _I love you_ to him. “Love you more.” And because he can’t resist the way that Jinyoung’s looking at him, he kisses him again. “Come on, before you really get me in trouble and I start not caring that we’re in a public place…”

They’re back out in the cold minutes later. Jaebum takes Jinyoung’s hand in his, before placing them both in his jacket pocket.

“Let’s go home before you turn into an ice cube.”

“If that happens, I know a way you can warm me up,” Jinyoung says and grins at the way Jaebum pulls him closer and mumbles under his breath that his boyfriend will be the death of him.

It’s the next moment when Jinyoung’s about to suggest hailing a taxi (they’ll get home quicker) that the words freeze in his mouth and they both come to a blinding stop as they turn the corner and run into Mark.

And Mark’s not alone, he’s with another younger man who is introduced as Youngjae Choi. And together, they’re holding the world’s cutest baby in their arms. A little Maltese named Coco.

To say it isn’t a bit awkward would be a total lie, but despite everything that happened, they had been friends at one time so they each put their plans on hold and head to a nearby coffee shop that’s pet friendly to get out of the cold and catch up.

With drinks in hand to help warm them, they find vacant chairs off to the side and sit down. There’s a lot of small sips and empty silences, until Youngjae states the obvious and makes a couple of jokes, lightening the atmosphere and making them laugh.

Before long the story of how Mark and Youngjae met is being told, with the two of them finishing each other sentences and it’s kind of cheesy and cute and it makes Jinyoung genuinely smile and fully relax for the first time since running into them.

Talk turns to college and classes and grad school and what their plans are for Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

It’s when Jaebum gets back from going to the restroom that Youngjae stands and stretches his arms out toward Mark. “I’ll take Coco out for a short walk, since she’s getting a little antsy.” Mark stares at Youngjae, both sides of his mouth quirking upward, because in reality, Coco is resting in his lap with her eyes closed and head down.

Even though he just sat down, Jaebum stands again. “I’ll go with you, it’s crowded in here and I was actually getting a little hot. I could use some fresh air.”

Youngjae smiles and clips the leash back to Coco’s collar. “Thanks, I would love the company.” He looks at his boyfriend and then Jinyoung. “You two can talk about things, or you know whatever. We’ll be back in fifteen or twenty minutes.”

When they’re left alone, Jinyoung’s eyes meet Mark’s and immediately they start laughing at their boyfriends’ complete lack of subtlety. A zebra hiding with a herd of horses would be less suspicious than what just happened.

“Youngjae seems very nice,” Jinyoung says. Mark and Youngjae look good together and it makes him happy to see that.

“He is.”

“I wanted—”  
“I thought about—”

They start speaking at the same time and break off just as quickly.

“Sorry. You first,” Jinyoung offers.

“No, you.”

Knowing between the two of them, they could go back and forth for a while trying to be considerate, Jinyoung nods and starts over. “I wanted to call you. I started to a few times,” he admits, “but I didn’t know if you would want to talk to me or if you would even answer…”

“The same.” Mark takes a sip of his coffee that’s grown cold. “I wasn’t sure either, and I thought maybe it’d be better if I didn’t.”

“I’m sorry for hurting you.” The words may be simple but they’re true. It’s what he has wanted to say for so long. “I know that may sound insincere or not enough, but I never meant to hurt you.”

“I’m okay now.” He smiles to show Jinyoung that it’s not just empty words being said. “It was hard at first, I won’t pretend it wasn’t. I loved you, but that doesn’t mean we were meant to be together. Some things work out and some don’t.”

Mark’s never been a fan of cliches, finding them rather annoying than anything else. But maybe there’s a gleam of truth in them and they are cliches for a reason because they’re right.

Sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together.

When Mark sees Youngjae enter the cafe again with Coco in his arms and laughing at something Jaebum said, the smile on his face is as natural to him as breathing. Love and falling in love is wonderfully strange because it’s unpredictable and a miracle in itself how everything can fall into place when you least expect it.

He sees how Jaebum’s eyes search out and lock with Jinyoung’s as he walks toward the table they share, and how Jinyoung reaches for his hand to pull Jaebum down next to him again and keeps their hands linked together. Together they radiate so much love and happiness that Mark’s surprised there aren’t little cartoon hearts and stars floating above their heads.

In life every ending is just a new beginning.

And sometimes, that new beginning is everything and more.

—

It’s exactly to the very day — and Jaebum is fairly certain he’s got the timing pretty close to the same hour too — sixteen years since they first met on the playground when they return to the same spot.

“Where are we? Are we here finally?” Jinyoung asks, when he hears the car stopping and Jaebum unbuckling his seat belt. He does the same, or tries to, but ends up struggling to find the seat belt latch since he’s blindfolded.

Not sure why he had to be blindfolded, he talked Jaebum into playing twenty questions, hot and cold style, during the drive to their destination. He ran out of questions half an hour back, and the closest he got to guessing was getting a response of lukewarm.

“Yes, we are.” He reaches over to unsnap Jinyoung’s seatbelt for him. “Stay seated and I’ll help you out of the car.”

A few moments pass and then Jaebum says, “Keep your eyes closed while I take the blindfold off, please.”

He’s dying of curiosity at all the suspense and intrigue, but he nods in agreement. “All right.”

And after taking a few more steps, “You can open them now.”

He sees Jaebum first, he always sees Jaebum first, and then his eyes widen as he finally takes in their surroundings and realizes exactly where they are.

“Mom told me the school is scheduled to be torn down next week,” Jaebum explains, watching Jinyoung’s face shift from stunned to disbelief to happiness. “I thought it would be nice for us to come back and…” His voice trails off, because it’s hard to put into words how thankful he is for that fateful day he met Jinyoung.

Jinyoung says nothing for a few moments, not because he is speechless (though that’s almost true), as he thinks back to their first meeting. This is where they started, all those years ago.

“It is nice,” he says quietly. “Thank you.”

Countless memories flash through his mind, cumulating until reaching this very moment with Jaebum standing in front of him, holding out his hand. He’s not on the ground this time, and he’s not crying (he feels that may happen soon), but the one thing that remains the same is he takes Jaebum’s hand without hesitation.

Jaebum leads him a short distance to underneath a shaded tree where there’s a blanket spread out and a wicker basket that he assumes holds food.

“How did you manage to set all this up?”

“I have my secret agent ways,” Jaebum replies back with a grin.

“Sure you do, I’ll get the truth out of you later,” Jinyoung promises and takes a seat next to Jaebum on the blanket. “I’ve always wanted to have a picnic date. There’s just something about it that’s both simple and romantic.”

“You should have told me, I would have made it happen sooner.” Jaebum takes out a couple of champagne flutes and sparkling cider (non-alcoholic because he’s driving). The cider is still cold thanks to his prearranged planning which consisted of Jinyoung’s cousin volunteering his assistance. He pours Jinyoung’s glass first and then his.

Jinyoung shakes his head lightly and takes the drink from Jaebum, careful not to spill it. “It’s perfect how it is now.”

Jaebum agrees. “I have something for you,” he says, but then realizes he should have poured drinks later, not first. He takes Jinyoung’s glass back with a quick apology and sets both champagne flutes on an even patch of grass.

“Yes?” From the very moment he saw where they were, he couldn’t stop his mind from thinking what it meant for Jaebum to bring him back to the very spot they first met. There’s a sweet mix of nerves and excitement and _oh.my.god.is.this.really.happening?_ that settles deep within his stomach where the butterflies dance freely. He’s pretty sure his heart may beat right out of his chest in anticipation.

And then he sees what Jaebum is holding.

A chocolate chip cookie. It’s loved a lot, but it’s no longer his favorite thing ever — that title belongs solely to Jinyoung forever and always.

He takes the cookie from Jaebum, and lets out a little laugh, feeling foolish about where his thoughts had gone and what scene he had built up in his head since first arriving at their childhood schoolyard.

The feeling doesn’t last long because Jaebum isn’t finished.

“That’s how I got you to become my best friend sixteen years ago, and so I’m hoping,” Jaebum says, pulling out a box from his jacket, “that this,” he opens it to reveal a ring, “will get you to become my husband.”

The ring shines brightly and beautiful and it is everything that Jinyoung has always wanted because it’s the man in front of him asking the question. The cookie falls forgotten to the ground, and all the tears he’s held back start streaming down his face.

“Will you marry me, Jinyoung Park?”

FIN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIN >> who knew three little letters could hurt so much to type out? 
> 
> Hopefully you’re not tired of the different universes I’m creating with the characters, because there’s more. The third installment is Stupid Lies: Let It All Burn Down.
> 
> I also plan to write a one-shot that’s strictly part of the Stupid Cliches universe and focuses on how Mark and Youngjae met. I thought they deserved their own story. JJP will make an appearance in the story (my current plan). The title most likely will be: I’ve Got Sunshine (On a Cloudy Day).
> 
> Comments, thoughts on the story and how it developed and progressed, favorite lines or scenes, constructive criticism… all of it is very welcomed and appreciated.


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